Dickson C. Igwe. Photo: VINO/File

The investigators sift all this data until what is relevant remains. He then makes deductions. This or that piece cannot be linked to any of the other pieces of the puzzle, even though it appears relevant. It simply does not fit in with the most likely narrative. He adopts both logic and perception.

The relevant dots are linked, and a pattern emerges. A story or tale that points to motive, opportunity, and evidence emerges. That tale is where the investigation takes on greater purpose, and the outcome of the case is near. The outcome this investigator aims to define is who will win the Virgin Islands General Election due sometime in 2027 or even before that.

Now, one dot that has stood the test of time is the likability of a candidate or their dislike. Being like is not a guarantee of success, but a huge asset nonetheless.

The story on the street corners, in the bars, and even houses of ill repute where in this storyteller’s opinion is where the voodoo that offers accuracy on an election outcome locate is that if one greatly loved politician BILLY BUNTER the most folksy and gifted talker in the Virgin Islands with political skills to match and the cunning of a wily fox, ever returned from his forced exile somewhere in the Americas he will be met with the greatest motorcade in Virgin Islands history and anointed King.

His armchair at the refurbished Central Admin Complex awaits his ample form. His scampish ways and illegal shenanigans may have already been forgiven where it matters most: in the hearts of the majority of voters.

On the other hand, history teaches that in politics being disliked is a dot no one needs. A disliked candidate can get elected, but with far greater energy and tremendous party organisation. Unless like one player who went through a period being disliked but appears to have overcome that burden today, and who essentially has owned his district for ages.

Then Labels stick. A positive label is a great thing. One past leader was renowned for very able footwork and a wonderful twist and turn of his torso on the dance floor. He charmed voters with his side step and his equally glamorous wife.

Another politician who appears safe in his district is very adept at using culture and fungi music while helping his Aunt Dora with her clay pit oven in baking a crispy cassava bread. His rendition of a people’s man is a powerful tool in his armory.

Another politician known to love a great party is not a bad label at all if well adopted. Anyone who has witnessed this man at a fete will know the term ‘the very soul of the party.’ The great man’s dancing ability is legendary. He is most famously known for a retort that has now become part of Virgin Islands Folklore: a retort against the verbal punches of a colleague in the House of Assembly: ‘’ GOD GOT MEH BACK.’’

Virgin islanders are a rhythmic and musical lot with a love of the poetic and the absurd.

Be very careful with negative labels. They stick to the victim better than glue. Once defined by a label, it is not easy to lose that definition. Being termed Jump Over King, the Asian Candidate, Bully, Micromanager, Low Energy, is never a plus. The politician will amble into the election with one arm tied behind his or her back. Try hard not to be labelled. It is an old trick in the back and forth of political warfare.

But who am I to advise anyone? If you need any advice on this subject visit Billy Bunter where ever he may be at this time as he waist to be returned to his Virgin Islands Kingdom and scuffled back into a vast office in a vast office block by a hotel called MARIA’s. Yes, being liked counts, big time.