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We have lost our 'manners & everything’- Ida M. Barry-Pickering

- Senior Virgin Islander says this new generation is ‘not even close’ to what the old generation was about
Ida M. Barry-Pickering, seen here as a contestant of the Mr and Ms Senior BVI pageant on May 12, 2019, has lamented the lack of good manners in the territory. Photo: YouTube
Appearing on Talking Points on ZBVI 780 AM on Monday, December 11, 2023, wearing a straw hat she made herself, Ida M. Barry-Pickering (2nd from right) reflected on how the Virgin Islands was when she was a child growing up and how she sees it now. Left is Damion C. Grange and Violet Thomas-Gaul. Right is Elvin Grant. Photo: Facebook
Appearing on Talking Points on ZBVI 780 AM on Monday, December 11, 2023, wearing a straw hat she made herself, Ida M. Barry-Pickering (2nd from right) reflected on how the Virgin Islands was when she was a child growing up and how she sees it now. Left is Damion C. Grange and Violet Thomas-Gaul. Right is Elvin Grant. Photo: Facebook
BAUGHERS BAY, Tortola, VI- Senior citizen of the Virgin Islands Mrs Ida Margarita Barry-Pickering has lamented the lack of good manners in the territory, a place that has prided itself on the “good mornings” and “good afternoons” to even strangers.

Appearing on Talking Points on ZBVI 780 AM on Monday, December 11, 2023, wearing a straw hat she made herself, Barry-Pickering reflected on how the Virgin Islands was when she was a child growing up and how she sees it now.

She said having good manners was something parents took very seriously.

“You could not behave rude. When you see somebody on the road you have to say good morning or good afternoon and if that person tells your mom that you meet them and you just smiled and didn’t say good morning or good afternoon, you getting your bottom cut.

“You got to be up to date,” Barry-Pickering said, adding that you had to greet even strangers. “You must say something and don’t even be rude to them or else you get licks again.”

‘This new generation is far different’- Ida M. Barry-Pickering

Asked by co-host Mr Elvin Grant if she sees those qualities still existing in the community, Barry-Pickering replied instantly: “No, they are not even close.”

Asked why she thought this is so, Barry-Pickering said “The children is a different set. They [are] not what we used to be. This new generation is far different from the old generation.”

Co-host Violet Thomas-Gaul responded, “We have lost quite a bit of our culture.”

“Manners and everything, Barry-Pickering added.

Barry-Pickering prides herself on being a member of St Paul’s Anglican Church in Sea Cows Bay all her life and says he has seen the membership grow over the years.

She said she is always ready to invite persons to worship at the church.

16 Responses to “We have lost our 'manners & everything’- Ida M. Barry-Pickering”

  • So true (14/12/2023, 11:35) Like (13) Dislike (4) Reply
    You're right Mrs Barry we don't and it has alot to do with the different heritage of ppl we have now mixing and mingles just the other day I was at the supermarket and I stood wilfully not saying good day and no one came in n said good day to no one and it's really a lost of hope for your heritage around here things change
  • On matters of grammar (14/12/2023, 12:02) Like (10) Dislike (4) Reply
    "Manners" and "Mannerisms" are not one and the same. One can use or display a lot of mannerisms without actually having or showing good manners.
  • hog (14/12/2023, 12:19) Like (33) Dislike (0) Reply
    I hate going to a business establishment and greeting the workers who just stare at you rather than reply. Is pure hog it have in some of these places
    • @hog (14/12/2023, 14:50) Like (19) Dislike (2) Reply
      Yes, yes. Speaking of that, I will not name the place of business that I went into to purchase a cup of coffe, when I enter the business I said hi, good morning how are you, the worker just looked me in the face and said nothing. A white customer entered the business and the worker greeted the white customer by saying good morning. WELLLL, the white customer just kept walking and did not say a word or acknowledge the worker. I paid for my coffee look the worker in her face and said good for your black A and have a good day. By the way I am black as well.
      • Rudeness all around (14/12/2023, 19:40) Like (7) Dislike (0) Reply
        Name the place man! How will there be any change if we just ignore this kinda rudeness. You spending your money ..not begging!
    • @hog (14/12/2023, 17:19) Like (17) Dislike (0) Reply
      I came to the point where I don’t say anything anymore to some of the swine and boar hogs. I had a friend that came to visit from New York and he felt like eating a COBB SALAD. All he did was ask the server if they have COBB SALAD. NO JOKE NO LIE, THE SERVER WAS LIKE WA? WE DONT SELL NO COBB SALAD HERE IN A NASTY TONE. WE GOT UP AND WENT SOMEWHERE ELSE TO EAT.
  • thank you (14/12/2023, 12:23) Like (25) Dislike (1) Reply
    I am the type of person when I enter a business, I always say good morning and when I am leaving, I always say thank you and have a good day. Some would respond and some would look at me like I have offended them. But honestly, manners is at a all time low in the BVI.
  • resident (14/12/2023, 12:59) Like (28) Dislike (4) Reply
    I don't think it's an influx of culture because it was the same in all of the islands. Manners was inculcated in us. Younger generation is just rude and disrespectful all over.
  • meh (14/12/2023, 13:13) Like (3) Dislike (13) Reply
    While she is indeed right, she has to also realize that those "manners" as she calls them stem from abusing the kids. You were abused because you didn't say something “You could not behave rude. When you see somebody on the road you have to say good morning or good afternoon and if that person tells your mom that you meet them and you just smiled and didn’t say good morning or good afternoon, you getting your bottom cut." Why? because the individual may have not have been minding your business, they are minding theirs when doing what they doing. As older generations you have to also understand that not everyone is like you. We are all raised differently and are different and if we walking down the road minding our business why you want to go to my mother or father or whomever and tell them I didn't say good day? I could be having a bad day and don't want to speak, it doesn't mean I'm rude. Jesus, I get the old ways taught us things but they also pointed to the abuse y'all endured when growing up and want to keep inflicting on the newer generation. Yes, say good afternoon or whatever but if the individual doesn't want to because they don't want to, then who are you to not say good afternoon, even if they don't say it back. Who are you to want to go to their elders and say "so and so didn't say good.... "Ok and?
  • tell the truth (14/12/2023, 14:06) Like (4) Dislike (14) Reply
    From the days of the slavery plantation children and adults were abused if they did not greet the ruling class. It was an integral part of the enslavement. How many tourists do you find greeting locals with good morning and good afternoon they politely ask a question if they need to but they don't walk around ensuring that they say good morning or good afternoon to every person that they meet. The social structure has evolved and so has the mannerism. The truth is you would be regarded as retarded or mentally unstable if you were to go around making sure that you say good morning or good afternoon to every person that you pass on the street today. For those of us who come from the old school it may seem strange but for the new generation it is perfectly normal we live in a constantly changing world and need to recognize the time regardless if we like it or not. That's just the way it is.
  • Things do Chhange. (14/12/2023, 22:49) Like (0) Dislike (0) Reply
    That is the price we have and will continue to pay for the importation of American mannerisms, values, capatlist models and other, while jettisoning our own values into the Atlantic. Things do change,but there must be an effort made to retaithe things that are valuable to us.
  • @ MEH & TELL THE TRUTH (15/12/2023, 00:26) Like (0) Dislike (0) Reply
    U have just exposed your level of ignorance , U had need to just stay in the bush and keep IT for yourself and FAMILY
  • AH NOTICE (15/12/2023, 06:27) Like (0) Dislike (0) Reply
    U hiding or afraid to post my bloggs , because am exposing your hypocrisy AND U can run or hide from the truth , but KARMA IS WHAT YOU CANNOT GET AWAY FROM SO ÌT WILL CATCH UP WITH YOU ( MR SUBTERFUGE AND THOSE WHO IS USING DECEPTION TO HIDE YA'LL GUILT . YA'LL IS ONLY MAKING THE COUNTRY LOOK LIKE A RACIST COUNTRY TO ADD TO YHE GUNS / THE DRUGS / THE MURDERS AND WHATEVER THAT GOES ON HERE AND SOME OF YOU ARE GETTING RICH OVER THE LIVES OF INNOCENT P
    PEOPLE , ITS BLOOD MONEY , BUT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY WILL SUFFER FROM YA'LL ACTIONS ■ SEE IF YOU CAN KILL GOD NOW . HE IS OMNIPOTENT ~ OMNISCIENCE AND OMNIPRESENT NOT ANY OF YOU , WHO THINK PROTRAY AN IMAGE OF HOLINESS OR INNOCENCE TO THE PUBLIC , SO YOU CAJN KEEP ON FOOLING YOURSELVES . Amen ????
  • Character (15/12/2023, 08:49) Like (1) Dislike (0) Reply
    common cortesy greeting makes friends ! every body is about me! until we relize our breath is not our own.
  • Disinterested (16/12/2023, 13:01) Like (1) Dislike (0) Reply
    Good manners and other cultural norms are important but IMO they are soft infrastructure stuffs and not high on the radar screen. We/BVI have hard infrastructure need me which are both important and urgent, ie, pothole riddled poorly constructed and maintained roads, unreliable potable water supply, raw sewage running in the street, skyrocketing cost of living, undiviserfied economy, underperforming education system, less than First World healthcare system, rising violent and property crimes, open burning of solid waste, emitting toxic and hazardous funds which h posed a health risk, congested capital with more cars than spaces, public safety issues, police issues, etc. My view…


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