Akil Johnson is the author of the highly acclaimed book Lies I Never Quite Believed; copies are available through BVI Sales agent Mr. Freeman at 443-1079 or at Serendipity Book Store. You may also get a copy on your iPad, Kindle, or Nook tablet in their respective bookstores. Photo: Provided

You’ve been dealing with a problem you long to understand. Sometimes you don’t know just what the tears are for, but you know it’s a hurt too deep to ignore; but you do ignore it because it feels too complex for you to explore it. So you floor it, that’s how you live your life; because you know that if you take your foot off the gas, people will start to see your mask.

Loved ones and friends will ask, “Honey what’s wrong, where is that light in your eyes, where has it gone?” I’ve lost that light myself a time or two, but keeping it on is something that I’ve decided to be committed to. The soul is something we must renew, Jesus saves but He is not going to do your work for you. I send you love, that’s what these words are about. From this work I could never be retired, not as long as I am inspired. 

Feb 13.

The Report Card: Pretend for a moment that the world was your classroom. How would you grade you family, friends and foes? How would you grade yourself? I was thinking of all those who I’d give As to. Like those friends who you know will love you until the end of time, they give you hope because their hearts are kind. Then there are the foes and so on the report card goes…

A+ to all the people who know what true friendships are all about. They love the whole person they wish for you to be. While they wait for you to realize the beauty in yourself which they already see.

B+ to all the people who honestly try to honor the values of friendship but fail because they tell themselves a lie; they don't know what the truth is because instead of facing it they rather die. They have good hearts that have been broken, and although they give love they are unable to accept it's token.

C, D, & E you are the worst group of company. You are the author of confusion, and drama is always the conclusion. You are the kind of folks who keep the Bs from being As. Cynicism, Disappointment, and Evil define all of your ways. You stand in the way of the good other people try to do, and all the while testifying the problem is everyone but you.

F is for you parasites who plot and plan to kill. Your heart is black and in it, there is no good will. Humans wonder if you are human, because you give off such a chill. When others are moved by compassion, you somehow remain still. The graves you dig for others is where I pray you will be. May out of the wombs of mothers, come hope for all of humanity.

Feb 25.

Joy cometh: For that son or daughter you’ve been trying to get help for, they don’t seem to want your love anymore. That brother you’ve lost to the streets that you have to hide your purse from when he comes by to eat. So many of you are fighting a battle in trying to keep a loved one alive, and it is killing you because it’s a battle they don’t seem to want to survive. I was thinking about those loved ones and I was thinking about you. I truly hope that joy does come in the way you want it to.

Joy cometh in the morning but how will you know lying in a coffin, locked and labeled with a warning? You've been nothing but a thorn in everybody's side. We've all been digging, but no one can reach you under the weight of your pride. We can only hope that you free yourself while its still up to you to decide.

Pride falls like snow, not heavy enough to alert you until you're buried deeper than you know. It draws you in like the seas to go further and further, until leaving means a couple of broken knees. Now you owe more than you can pay, for dipping too deep in the well to provide false comforts for where you lay. Now the waters rise at your feet and there is nowhere for you to retreat. You leave us with our hearts broken, because you valued your life to be worth no more than a token. Joy cometh in the morning, at least it was suppose to. Now the sun shines on the remains of someone we were so close to. Someone we loved but couldn't reach; someone with whom we had so many lessons to share but couldn't teach. Someone who might have been saved by the grief their own passing caused, but they left us because they thought the love was lost. Now for not knowing how to love, we all must bear the cost. 

Connect with Akil on Facebook: facebook.com/emancipationofakil

Akil is the author of the highly acclaimed book Lies I Never Quite Believed; copies are available through BVI Sales agent Mr. Freeman at 443-1079 or at Serendipity Book Store. You may also get a copy on your iPad, Kindle, or Nook tablet in their respective bookstores.